


Christmas Dinner

by abovethesmokestacks



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Based on Tumblr Post, Christmas fic, Drabble Series, F/M, Food Blog AU, Recipes, the greatest challenge here is to write like someone who runs a foodie blog
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-05
Updated: 2018-12-23
Packaged: 2019-09-12 07:41:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,442
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16868887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/abovethesmokestacks/pseuds/abovethesmokestacks
Summary: "I know I said I was gonna kick this off on the first day of December, but well, I had an unfortunate meeting with a brand of vodka that I didn’t take kindly to (I know, I was as shocked as you are)." A food blogger shares their favourite holiday recipes before Christmas but not before sharing stories of friends, food, drink and a mysterious someone...





	1. Drinks

**Author's Note:**

> My friend Beka sent me a link to a tumblr post about a fic concept where one character is a food blogger and chapters are formatted like online recipes, complete with a looooong prelude before you actually get to the recipe.
> 
> And you know me, I like recipes. And fics. So yeah. 
> 
> I'm late crossposting the first chapter, but the remaining chapters will all be posted on Sundays

Hi, guys.

I know I said I was gonna kick this off on the first day of December, but well, I had an unfortunate meeting with a brand of vodka that I didn’t take kindly to (I know, I was as shocked as you are). I’m not even gonna befoul my keyboard with naming it. You’d think I’d know better, right? Especially since I was in charge of drinks last night. A friend of mine decided a while back to have a party to kick off the yuletide season and asked if I could perhaps provide a fancy cocktail to class things up a bit.

What can I say, I live to serve.

Apparently to serve booze, that is.

I don’t pretend to be some mixology master, but god damn, I served up something delicious, and you guys deserve to take part in the recipe. I’m nice like that. Plus, it fits in well with my plan to provide you guys with one recipe each week to give you a little inspiration for the Christmas season by means of my humble blog. And everyone knows a good Christmas party kicks off with a nice cocktail.

And then it continues with more cocktails. At least if your friend’s name is Thor, and has friends that will take any chance to cheers. I did find one kindred spirit among all the guests, doing me a favour by keeping me company while I mixed like my life depended on it. Seriously, this cocktail was that good.

Not gonna lie, they were easy on the eyes. Sadly my eyes got a bit… shall we say, cloudy once people decided they were more interested in the individual parts of the drink instead of carrying on drinking the delicious final results. Enter the Vodka We Won’t Name. Thank god, my newfound friend decided to help me out, though I don’t much remember it. I woke up at home this morning with a headache that was only just below explosive, with a note under a glass of water and a painkiller.

Apparently, my saving angel roped Thor, who I know was fairly sloshed once things got fuzzy for me, to haul me home. I was dumped on the couch, coerced (I assume this may have entailed some threats, because I have… vague recollections of someone saying stuff to me in a rather aggressive tone) into having water and a painkiller and then left in a position that would apparently help with not choking in case all that vodka decided to backpedal through my system.

I may need to thank them.

Not with booze, though.

Anyway, enjoy the recipe for the cocktail and please drink responsibly, people. We don’t all have Thors and beautiful good samaritans in our lives.

 

* * *

[White Winter Cosmopolitan](https://www.creative-culinary.com/winter-white-cosmopolitan/)


	2. Appetizer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am such a sucker for the appetizer ingredient mentioned in this chapter that I had to go out and buy it so I could have it over the weekend. Hope you enjoy this!

I don’t know about you guys, but I fucking love appetizers. I’m not even sure if love is a strong enough word. I could eat my weight in appetizers and not give a shit about the rest of dinner. Appetizers are like perfect little bitesized goodies that you can just stuff your face with. Whatever humanity did to deserve appetizers, thank you.

Now, because it is December, I am made up of about 75% appetizers. Seriously. Every weekend is a new Christmas party or invite to hang out or company something or other, and what do people serve? Appetizers. Steve (you guys remember him; tall, blonde, walked five blocks with flour handprints on his ass back in May) had a movie night yesterday, potluck kind of deal, so I dibbed appetizers so fast I think I broke some sort of record.

(I would also like to point out that Steve is a horrible person for making all of us sit through  _It’s a Wonderful Life_  because we all cried and looked like schmucks)

It’s my firm belief that the perfect appetizer is a combination of sweet and savoury, small enough to eat in one bite but not overwhelming that you can’t have another one. That being said, I am also a fan of an appetizer that is big enough to share with friends. The first is best suited if you’re hosting a party for a larger group of people where quantity is key, while the other kind is good for smaller gatherings with friends, where you can put the appetizer and any accoutrements on a table and just… dig in.

For that reason, you’ll get two recipes today, one for each type. I brought the first one to yesterday’s movie night. I was barely through the door when a familiar face appeared. It seems Thor brought them, and boy, was it an awkward reunion. How does one say  _“Hi, nice to see you again, sorry you had to drag my drunk ass home last week, I hope I didn’t puke on you or say something bad.”_  without, you know, saying those actual words? If you’re me, you don’t say anything at all, you just flee into the kitchen and hope for the best.

The best wasn’t too bad. My good samaritan ended up being a pretty good sous chef. I gotta say we make a pretty good team. Even backed me up during the movie when I said I got something in my eye (it was FEELINGS, for anyone interested).

Okay, enough about this. I want appetizers. I might just go out and buy more ingredients so I can stuff my face. If you’re a fan of brie, then Merry early Christmas to you.

* * *

 

[ **Cranberry Brie Bites** ](https://www.delish.com/cooking/recipe-ideas/recipes/a56610/cranberry-brie-bites-recipe/)

**Baked Brie**

Preheat your oven to 350 degrees F, and cut a thin sliver off the top of a wheel of brie. Place the cheese on a baking sheet with the cut side up and bake until soft and bubbly, about 15 minutes, then carefully transfer to a plate with a spatula.

If you want to season, you can drizzle honey over, or finely chopped walnuts, or sprinkle fresh herbs over.

Serve by dipping crackers, tart apples, toast or whatever floats your boat into the ooey gooey goodness. If the cheese starts to get too hard to dip in, just heat it up in the oven again in five minute increments until it has gone gooey again.


	3. Main Course

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is late, I know. I got home from a trip late on Sunday night and all but fell into bed. Then yesterday I partook in the tumblr logoff and thus couldn't access the edited version of the chapter that was sitting in my drafts. Hence a very late Tuesday posting. Hopefully, you'll still enjoy the chapter!

Show of hands, who else here is totally and utterly fucked, pardon my French, with Christmas presents?

Because I am.

I generally try to give something food-related to friends and family (to the point where my mother has started asking for that gift the second we all sit down to hand out presents), but you can’t give homemade truffles or artisanal fig jam to every person. I felt like such a cop out this weekend. I usually host a small dinner for my friends since most of us go spend Christmas with our families. It’s good to just hang out, eat good food, have some wine (and then some more). Plus, it gives me a chance to test out recipes for Christmas dinner. Call it Christmas rehearsal dinner.

Anyway, a few years back, my group of friends agreed to give out presents. Nothing major, we set a ten dollar budget, everyone buys one present and just before dessert, we put it all in a big bag and everyone gets to pick one present without peeking to see which one you get. It’s a good system, but not without its fault. Like last year, when Bruce plead guilty to being the evil mastermind behind the stack of five fidget spinners that Steve drew from the bag. He said he didn’t know what to do with them, he’d gotten them as swag from some convention, and that all his cousins and nieces and nephews and god knows who else already ran around with them so this was his last resort to getting rid of the damn things.

What did I get? you ask.

My lame ass drew my own gift yesterday. Homemade gin-lemon marmalade. Natasha and her boyfriend Clint both tried to convince me to trade. Which I would have, but Nat’s offer was for a set of wine glass markers and Clint did not stand a chance in hell at getting that marmalade with only a Yankee Candle as a bartering chip. Then again, I almost had to throw the damn thing at Thor because he brought up my good samaritan and told me  _in front of everyone_  how much fun they had last week. I’m usually not easily shaken or embarrassed, but  _dude_. People get smacked for less.

(I did tell Thor to relay a message after dinner)

(Because we are obviously all in fifth grade)

If nothing else, I know my Christmas ham recipe works. It’s traditional Christmas fare with my family. Turkey at Thanksgiving, ham at Christmas. It does take some preparation, but then again, so does just about anything you intend to serve at Christmas dinner. For my rehearsal dinners, I usually go for a smaller ham, partly because we’re not that many people, and it’s less that goes to waste in the unlikely event that it doesn’t turn out well.

* * *

 

**Honey-Mustard Crusted Ham**

1 ham, boneless

2 egg yolks

½ cup mustard

honey, to taste

panko

If you’ve bought a frozen ham, let it thaw in your fridge for about two days or until the core temperature is 50 degrees F. If you have bought a fresh, unfrozen ham, let it sit in room temperature for about 4-5 hours before you start cooking. Set your oven to 225 degrees F and place an oven rack in the middle. If you have a meat thermometer, insert it into the ham. Put it in a roasting pan and set to bake. If you’re using the meat thermometer, bake the ham until the core temp is 165 degrees F. Otherwise, the recommended cooking time i 22 minutes per pound of ham.

Take out the ham, and increase the oven temperature to 450 degrees F. Mix together honey and mustard. I prefer to mix myself rather than buy ready made honey mustard, that way I get the taste just the way I want it. Finally, stir in the yolks and brush the ham with the mixture. Dust with panko to cover and return to the oven for about 15 minutes, until the crust has turned golden.

Let the ham sit for at least ten minutes before you carve it. If you want to be fancy, you can press cloves into, although I should tell you to do this only when the ham has cooled off considerable. Otherwise, all you will taste is cloves, and you did not slather that hunk of meat in yummy honey mustard just to taste cloves.


	4. Dessert

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're here and it is officially Christmas Eve where I live. Thank you all for following this little adventure and I wish you all the happiest of holidays!

Guys, we have a problem.

My family is not coming for Christmas. Dad broke his leg, he’s at the hospital with my mom and sister. He’s fine, leg’s broken, but he’ll be fine. Christmas, on the other hand, is very much DOA. I don’t have a car, can’t get hold of a rental and every damn airline is booked. I have a whole damn Christmas dinner in my fridge waiting to be cooked and now it’s just me. I know I joke about being able to put away food like it’s going out of style, but not even I am skilled enough to eat everything I have crammed into my fridge.

Fuck.

I need a plan.

* * *

 

Okay, I slept on it, and…

Yeah, I still got nothing.

Except a lot of food.

Friends are all with their families, I don’t know my neighbours well enough to invite them over or invite myself over.

Shit.

Okay, no. We can fix this. We can make Christmas happen.

* * *

 

I made Christmas happen.

Well, to be fair, Christmas is still happening.

I love Christmas. I mean, it stresses me and everyone else out, but god, do I love it. The food, friends and family hanging out, singing Christmas carols (although I have it on good authority that I should not join a carolling group anytime soon). It’s that sense of warmth and togetherness that makes this stone cold lump of coal turn into a big ol’ marshmallow.

There’s this Facebook group I’m part of for the Brooklyn neighbourhood I live in, so while I was doing some prep, I posted that I’d be alone on Christmas and that I’d have enough to host about a dozen guests. It’s not usually something I’d do, but I told myself, “Bucky, are you gonna sit alone on Christmas and sulk over a mountain of food, or are you gonna have yourself some Yuletide spirit?”

Yuletide spirit, every damn time.

People responded. I made a goddamn event that I invited interested people to so they’d know where to go. I cooked. I made the ham, made appetizers and sides and drinks both boozy and non-alcoholic. I ravaged my pantry for every goddamn jar of anything I’ve ever made in the past year to give away as gifts to guests.

One by one, people started dropping in. These complete strangers that had nowhere else to be, and it just… felt so good. To be able to give them Christmas and a place to feel welcome.

And then the doorbell rang.

My own little Christmas miracle happened, and my good samaritan stood outside, smiling with a bottle of wine. Apparently, they texted Thor for my address after they saw my Facebook post. I tried to not grin like a complete loon, but god, I was so happy to see them. My sous chef, my samaritan and… my date? I think?

I don’t know what you call hanging out after everyone else has left, drinking wine and enjoying some frankly amazing dark muscovado truffles. I do, however know, that I wouldn’t have it any other way.

* * *

 

Sorry, update.

Forgot the recipe.

**Dark Muscovado Truffles**

6 oz dark chocolate, at least 60% cocoa

½ cup heavy cream

⅓ cup dark muscovado sugar

2 tbsp butter

cocoa

Chop the chocolate finely and put into a bowl. Mix the heavy cream, sugar and butter and bring to a boil. When everything is melted, pour it over the chocolate and stir. Allow to cool at room temperature and either allow to set and use a melon baller (dipped in warm water) to scoop out balls, or pour the cooled truffle mass into a pan clad with greaseproof paper and cut into squares once it has set completely. However you go about it, roll the cooled truffle pieces in cocoa powder.

_(Also, I still don’t know if this is a date. But we ended up under a mistletoe. So yeah. Christmas miracle, complete with a kiss. Merry flippin’ Christmas from me to you.)_


End file.
